For nights I dwelled on what you said,

Now I just wished you'd known how I felt.

If I said it now, would it change a thing?

Would it matter if you knew I was suffering?

Or would you just turn and walk away,

Pretend you didn't hear a single word I said.

Further into the sinkhole I sank,

Emotions devoured me from deep within.

From the depths of my soul you tore me up,

Left me in shattered pieces, you made me wait.

Why did you have to leave me in this state,

Where I'm still picking them up to date?

Maybe it's for the best you left me here,

In the darkness, I will find ground again. (maybe)

I wrote this quite awhile ago.. jus recently completed it.. im jus mass churning out poems... i dunno how to feel anymore... i dunno what to feel anymore. it hurts.. you try to move on, but you get stuck in the mud. the person you like, well, lets jus say things dun happen.. i cant take it.

2 yrs of waiting, forced to move on by a sudden change in action. it hurts so badly. half of me's gone. the waiting game should be played... but every move i make kills me. i wait, it kills me.. i move, it kills again.. why? am i thinkin too much?? am i askin for too much? i dun like the state im in... i cant help it. its the hols damnit.. it hits damn hard..

havent been hit by the bullet train since a very long time.. i need to get up... stand up damn it... stand up.. lemme give u the scenario.. ur lying on the track... u hurt so much cos u took it all in the chest. u collapse on the track.. u try to stand.. but then u realize.. hey, im still on the track.. n the train's gonna come again rite? hell, i'll jus lie down... so u lie still on the track... u close ur eyes.. and then u hear the next bullet train coming.. take it in ur own stride mate, take it in ur own stride.. u jus lie down there.. u jus get more numb wif pain as each train crashes into u, pinning u down. the trains dun stop coming and they get faster n faster.. what do u do then? as numb as u get, u jus wanna get up n walk off the track.. but u cant.. u finally realize ur not superman. ur damn not superman. ur at ur most vulnerable pt in time.. what makes it so difficult is cos u dun scream out for help. u swallow all the pain.. so nobody noes ur even stuck under trains.. but then, a lil while l8r, the pple closest to u realize dat ur not wif them.. they come lookin for u.. callin out for u.. they help u stand up to get off the track.. but again, its not a clean process, cos u still have thoughts on the root of the prob.. ur leg gets caught on the track. ur closest frens pull n pull... but they cant get u out.. another train's approaching.. u prepare to take the blow again.. u pray to god to give u strength.. u close ur eyes n wait for the train.. but as it approaches, u see thru the crack in yer eye, yer frens are lined in front of u, shielding u from the full blow of it.. wow.. and they work to get u outta there again. this is how i felt, still feeling n will feel.. the problem changes with each time becos them trains dun stop coming. wen it rains, it pours.. but somehow or another, the clouds will jus disappear..

mates, wen the bullet train hits u, u gotta keep standing up.. wen u cant, u hafta depend on yer closest frens.. thats wen u really noe who's there.. n who's not.. i noe who's there... do u?