2.10.04

life is warped, unless you have tons gd frens dat surrounds you. emotions are one warped thing as well if u ask me. especially if it clashes wif ur personality if u ask me. or mebbe im usin the wrong terms... but its really weird.. haha.

lets say ur kinda quick tempered. so like if someone scolds you, human instinct wuld be to get angry aye? but in some cases, if put across the scolding properly, u wuldn get angry wif the opposite party but at urself, cos u noe ur in the wrong. so now im kinda talkin bout those who scolds ya but u noe, sometimes say and do the wrong things? so instead of tryin to help correct u, u get put off more n ya get pissed wif the other person even at the end of the day u do noe ur in the wrong but u feel worse den horseshit.

now the clashing part. wen the opposite party is scoldin ya, ya culd do so many things.. ya culd stand up for urself, justify urself, work out a win-win solution or u culd start cursin at the person aye? (unless its of higher authority, u wuldn wanna do dat. ahha) thing is, the more the person is scolding ya, ur gettin more angry and ur head's spinning wif all the pent up anger. so wad do u do? do u try to solve it? diplomatically? BUT then.. u noe ur kinda hot tempered. n wen ur tons angry, u do the stupidest things u'd regret later on. SO WHAT HAPPENS DEN? lets try dis.. stand dere, receive all the scoldings, try to hold on for awhile, breathe in n out, den walk away. dun try to put in a word, just answer her/his questions str8 to the pt n dats it.

well, if u had done sumth like dis in the past, u've accomplished one thing if u asked me. ya din lose ur temper, say stupid stuff, it just ends dere n u wont get in2 deeper shit. dats good! u dun want a long lasting scolding rite? haha. but whats so bad bout it? well, first of all, the more u take in all these scoldings dat make u feel like horseshit, you wuld think dat hey, u are horseshit. u feel worse inside, it hurts so much u had wished u'd done sumth wen u was scolded but den again, ur afraid to make things worse. its a tons bad situation to be in.

Daniel Goleman, in his book said sumth bout useful criticism, whether in the office, anywhere, is about puttin the rite words across. u want the person to noe wad he/she has done wrong n how to improve next time n it just stops dere. pple will feel more compelled to work harder n improve demself cos well, its the truth. BUT if u criticize people and add in ur own harsh opinion of not oly wad dey're doin but demselves as well, ur gonna make dem feel lowly bout demselves n dey wuldn work better cos dey think they're still horseshit in ur eyes.. food for thought eh? haha.. mebbe not. oh wells. emotional intelligence frens... it helps..

BOOYA!